Tunnel to Hollow Earth
by Marty StPierre
(Presque Isle, Maine)
Someone is living in Hollow Earth! I live in Presque Isle, Maine. Yup, all the up at the top, and yes, its still winter here! April is a heavy month for snow.
Anyhow, I had a doctor visit down in Bangor and by the time I made it back to town, there was only an hour left on the work die. The missus didn’t expect me home early, and the plywood mill didn’t expect me back to work until the next day. I picked up a tall Budweiser and parked at Aroostook park for a hike.
I forgot just how steep the climb up to the view was. It must have took about an hour and I was sweating when I got to the top. This was last fall, so it wasn’t a shirt soaker, but I got my work out just going up. As I was sittin, and pouring back my back to cool off, I heard a snuffling noise coming up the trail!
Aroostook Mountain butts right up to the great northern woods that cover all of western Maine. Bears come through and they get big. Big enough to eat a lone hiker. I didn’t want him to smell my fear so I pounded my tall can, put it in my pack, and began jogging across the trail goin from one peak to the other. Another trail could take me down.
Well, I wasn’t looking were I was headed. I stomped through a pile of bear crap that buried my boot! I knew he would smell something then. I began running full tilt, but tripped on a root and tumbled down the far side of the peak. I ain’t been back to that part. It’s a climb enough to the top and down. Not like I was doin any choosing. I somersaulted a ways, getting muddy and scuffed up. I hit my head, too.
I tumbled down so long I thought I would die. Then things got dark, and through the bangin and scrapin I noticed that I was fallin into a tunnel. I nearly pissed myself, thinkin I fell right into the bear’s den.
I finally stopped and the thunk of metal echoed through the cave. When I stopped seeing spots, I noticed I could see bright as daylight, even though I fell pretty deep down into the tunnel. I know it was deep because it took me ten minutes just to climb back out again. Anyway, it was bright in that cave because this mossy stuff on the wall was glowin. That’s when I noticed the metal thing I bonked.
It was some kind of machine I never seen before. I worked at nearly every potato processing plant and lumber mill in these parts and never seen a machine like this one. Anyway, I didn’t get a good look because I seen two little baby bears sleeping on the other side of that machine!
I’m happy to be alive. I ran all the way up that hill and didn’t stop until I was back in the Ford. I don’t know how I got away from the mama bear.
Then I got to thinkin about the machine. Someone musta put it there a long time ago. That bear wouldn’t share a den with nobody. The glowing moss got me thinking too. Then I realized I found an entrance to Hollow Earth! The walls glow cuz there ain’t no sun on the inside of the planet. Only a real moron would buy that part of the theory.
Anyway, if it weren’t for the bear and how long I had to climb, I’d take ya back there next time you are in town.
- Marty StPierre